Random Wrestling News

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Bandit
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Bandit » Sun Feb 17, 2019 12:32 am

The real reason Roman Reigns was suspended is that he was snorting cocaine off Nick Jackson ass.
:oshocked:

Roman to AEW confirmed!

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Sun Feb 17, 2019 12:36 am

Cesaro is actually Samoan.

The midcard of Greed is now a shoot match with no script. Kurt Angle against Paul Ellering with Ricky Steamboat on a pole.

The next wrestler to do porn will be Finn Balor. His partner will be the rotting corpse of Michael Hayes.

Enzo Amore new tag partner and catchphrase: This is Luke Harper, and he's a peanut, and you can't teach that.

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Bandit
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Bandit » Sun Feb 17, 2019 12:49 am

Actually, the person who had the idea of the Montreal Screwjob was Baron Corbin.
Image
Ted Turner just gave Russo all the money he needs to compete with WWE. Russo's big idea: The Great Muta, Kota Ibushi and Daniel Bryan on the main event, fighting against the evil Ministry.
Some of these are accidentally good.
Sasha Banks is going to be murdered by Scott Steiner, bro.
A heart attack from too many orgasms.

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Big Boss Man
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Big Boss Man » Sun Feb 17, 2019 4:26 am

On his deathbed, Vince McMahon reveals that Bret didn't screw Bret. Actually, Ultimate Warrior screwed Bret.
Bro, the next champion of Impact Wrestling will be the Anthem Owl. What the marks aren't expecting is that, bro, under the Owl mask is Drew Galloway, joining the Bullet Club.
The Russo Button
We are creating a new DVD: The Rise and Fall of Shinsuke Nakamura. Chapter 1: G1 Climax Finals
Bro, the next champion of Impact Wrestling will be the Anthem Owl. What the marks aren't expecting is that, bro, under the Owl mask is Triple H, joining the Latino World Order.
Bro, the actual leaker of the Paige sextapes is Goldust.
Low Ki will turn face against Michael Cole because he was a news anchor on Utica, New York.
CM Punk will return to the WWE by turning face, making Kamala win the WCW Cruiserweight Championship against The Big Dog.
Dave Meltzer will hold the WWE Hardcore Championship for 308 days, only to drop it to Jay Lethal.
Bro, the actual leaker of the Paige sextapes is Kamala.
Actually, the person who had the idea of the Montreal Screwjob was Vince Russo.
The Great Khali will hold the IWGP Intercontinental Championship for 331 days, only to drop it to Prince Puma.
Ted Turner just gave Russo all the money he needs to compete with WWE. Russo's big idea: Asuka, Andre the Giant and Eddie Guerrero on the main event, fighting against the evil Dangerous Alliance.
Tye Dillinger is actually a player formerly known as Mousecop.
The TNA gimmick for Matt Hardy: Kevin Nash
The next wrestler to do porn will be Kane. His partner will be the rotting corpse of Marty Scurll.
Rob Van Dam made a shoot interview. He said that the only reason he didn't win the NWO Championship is because The Viper said so.
Ted Turner just gave Russo all the money he needs to compete with WWE. Russo's big idea: Jerry Lawler, Raven and Big E on the main event, fighting against the evil Great Bash Heel.
The dark match of December to Dismember is now a shoot match with a big ass script. Alexa Bliss against Karl Anderson hot asian wife with Jim Cornette on a pole.
The undercard of SmackDown is now composed of a Kevin Sullivan on a pole match of Vince Russo against Jim Cornette for the The Gift of the Gods Championship
The dark match of Ultima Lucha is now a shoot match with a big ass script. Oney Lorcan against Curtis Axel with Chris Benoit on a pole.
The main event of NXT Invasion is now a shoot match with no script. Naomi against Karl Anderson hot asian wife with Mick Foley on a pole.
On his deathbed, Vince McMahon reveals that Bret didn't screw Bret. Actually, Bayley screwed Bret.
Razor Ramon is going to be murdered by Eddie Guerrero, bro.
Naomi is going to be murdered by Dusty Rhodes, bro.
Neville is going to do a new pipebomb: I don’t hate you, Jim Cornette. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate this idea that you’re the best. Because you’re not. I’m the best. I’m the best in the world. There’s one thing you’re better at than I am and that’s kissing Jimmy Hart ass. You’re as good as kissing ass as KUSHIDA was. I don’t know if you’re as good as Chet Chetterfield though.
The undercard of NWO Souled Out is now a shoot match with a big ass script. Christian against Sable with Matt Hardy on a pole.
On his deathbed, Vince McMahon reveals that Bret didn't screw Bret. Actually, Alexa Bliss screwed Bret.
Alexa Bliss made a shoot interview. He said that the only reason he didn't win the WWE Championship is because Dalton Castle said so.
The real reason Roman Reigns was suspended it that he was snorting cocaine off Neville ass.
Bro, the next champion of Impact Wrestling will be the Anthem Owl. What the marks aren't expecting is that, bro, under the Owl mask is Brad Maddox, joining the NWO.
Bro, the actual leaker of the Paige sextapes is Alexa Bliss.
Dave Meltzer is going to make his WWE debut on SmackDown
Marty Scurll is going to do a new pipebomb: I don’t hate you, Chad Gable. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate this idea that you’re the best. Because you’re not. I’m the best. I’m the best in the world. There’s one thing you’re better at than I am and that’s kissing Curtis Axel ass. You’re as good as kissing ass as Terry Funk was. I don’t know if you’re as good as Ryback though.
Matt Hardy is going to win the WWE Hardcore Championship on Battlebowl.
Lucha Underground next big thing: Nigel McGuinness portraying Nostradamus reborn. He wins the WWE King of Vince Championship by beating Samoa Joe, featuring the debut of his ally, David Flair.
The real reason Roman Reigns was suspended it that he was snorting cocaine off Big Cass ass.
William Regal will turn tweener against Ted Turner because he saw Bray Wyatt with Sami Zayn.
CM Punk will return to the WWE by turning tweener, making El Generico win the TNA Knockouts Championship against Samoa Joe.
Ted Turner just gave Russo all the money he needs to compete with WWE. Russo's big idea: Bob Backlund, Rob Van Dam and Andre the Giant on the main event, fighting against the evil Beautiful People.
The Great Khali is going to do a new pipebomb: I don’t hate you, Michael Hayes. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate this idea that you’re the best. Because you’re not. I’m the best. I’m the best in the world. There’s one thing you’re better at than I am and that’s kissing Vince McMahon ass. You’re as good as kissing ass as Eric Bischoff was. I don’t know if you’re as good as Davey Boy Smith though.
The main event of Survivor Series is now composed of a Dario Cueto on a pole match of Paige against Cactus Jack for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship
Dario Cueto made a shoot interview. He said that the only reason he didn't win the WCW World Heavyweight Championship is because Charlotte said so.
Seth Rollins is actually square.
Lucha Underground next big thing: Michael Hayes portraying an egyptian pharoah reborn, whose only desire is to kill. He wins the WWE Intercontinental Championship by beating Matt Hardy, featuring the debut of his ally, Macho Man.
Samoa Joe framed Benoit.
The Russo Button
Enzo Amore new tag partner and catchphrase: This is Cactus Jack, and he's the true mastermind behind Southpaw Regional Wrestling, and you can't teach that.
Your 2023 Royal Rumble match winner, the guy who filmed the Paige threesome.
Your 2027 Royal Rumble match winner, the true mastermind behind Southpaw Regional Wrestling.
The next wrestler to do porn will be Cody Rhodes. His partner will be the rotting corpse of Hiroshi Tanahashi.
Hayabusa is going to win the NXT Championship on Starrcade.
Bro, the actual leaker of the Paige sextapes is Randy Orton.
Under the mask of Mr. America lies Jason Jordan.
Actually, the person who had the idea of the Montreal Screwjob was Bret Hart.

Ocelot
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Ocelot » Mon Feb 18, 2019 7:29 am

Holy shit I take a break from wrestling and come back and everyone in our illustrious wrestling business is still acting like they're 12. I love this shit. Never change, wrestling world.

Also, hi y'all.

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Mon Feb 18, 2019 11:06 pm

Ocelot wrote:
Mon Feb 18, 2019 7:29 am
Also, hi y'all.
:hi:

Had any Twitter fights with Corey Graves lately?

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Big Boss Man
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Big Boss Man » Tue Feb 19, 2019 5:41 am

Welcome back Oce!

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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Ocelot » Wed Feb 20, 2019 4:34 am

Thanks guys.

Also, of all the divas to be cheating on your woman with....

Carmella?

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Wed Feb 20, 2019 2:56 pm


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Bandit
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Bandit » Thu Feb 21, 2019 11:08 am

A Hulk Hogan biopic has been announced, with Netflix close to finalizing a deal.

The Hollywood Reporter reported this afternoon that Chris Hemsworth, best known for playing Thor in the Marvel Cinematic Universe films, is set to play Hulk Hogan in an upcoming biopic directed by Todd Phillips, who directed the Hangover trilogy.

Hemsworth and Phillips, along with actor Bradley Cooper, Michael Sugar (writer of 8 Mile and the director for the upcoming Joker film), and Eric Bischoff will serve as producers. Hulk Hogan will also serve as a consultant and executive producer along with Ashley Zalta, who is a part of Sugar’s Sugar23 production company.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, the film will not focus on Hogan’s later troubles, which include the lawsuit against Gawker regarding a sex tape that later revealed derogatory racial language. Instead, it is being described as an origin story that will feature the rise of Hogan's career.

The Hollywood Reporter says that the Hogan movie project “is in the midst” of closing with Netflix.
Oh good Lord.

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Thu Feb 21, 2019 1:59 pm


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Big Boss Man
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Big Boss Man » Fri Feb 22, 2019 3:56 am

Bandit wrote:
Thu Feb 21, 2019 11:08 am
A Hulk Hogan biopic has been announced, with Netflix close to finalizing a deal.

The Hollywood Reporter reported this afternoon that Chris Hemsworth, best known for playing Thor in the Marvel Cinematic Universe films, is set to play Hulk Hogan in an upcoming biopic directed by Todd Phillips, who directed the Hangover trilogy.

Hemsworth and Phillips, along with actor Bradley Cooper, Michael Sugar (writer of 8 Mile and the director for the upcoming Joker film), and Eric Bischoff will serve as producers. Hulk Hogan will also serve as a consultant and executive producer along with Ashley Zalta, who is a part of Sugar’s Sugar23 production company.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, the film will not focus on Hogan’s later troubles, which include the lawsuit against Gawker regarding a sex tape that later revealed derogatory racial language. Instead, it is being described as an origin story that will feature the rise of Hogan's career.

The Hollywood Reporter says that the Hogan movie project “is in the midst” of closing with Netflix.
Oh good Lord.
This has potential to be Wrestlecrap Gold :olol:

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Bandit
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Bandit » Fri Feb 22, 2019 4:01 am

They will have to CGI a 900 pound Andre for him to slam at Mania III. They can hire the guy who did Thanos CGI.

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Big Boss Man
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Big Boss Man » Fri Feb 22, 2019 5:27 am

:olol:

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Bandit
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Bandit » Fri Feb 22, 2019 5:56 am

Also Bradley Cooper must be a big wrestling fan. He's also wanting to play Vince if that movie actually got made. Although really only Gary Busey is insane enough to realistically portray Vince.

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Sat Feb 23, 2019 12:53 am


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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Sun Feb 24, 2019 12:38 am


The Rock's mum is 6 months older than Flair. She looks about 15 years younger than him.

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Big Boss Man
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Big Boss Man » Sun Feb 24, 2019 1:32 am

Bandit wrote:
Fri Feb 22, 2019 5:56 am
Also Bradley Cooper must be a big wrestling fan. He's also wanting to play Vince if that movie actually got made. Although really only Gary Busey is insane enough to realistically portray Vince.
Gary Busey as Vince would be perfect casting :olol:

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Mon Feb 25, 2019 6:25 pm


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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Random Wrestling News

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Sun Mar 03, 2019 12:52 am



Shit news.


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