Celebrity News Thread

[Bandit]

Dave Chappelle is jacked.

[Big Boss Man]

Yea surprised how jacked Dave looked, compared to how he looked on Chappelle show. Sign him up Vince! Get him and Paul Mooney on board the writing team too!

[Dr. Zoidberg]

The biggest news story of our lifetime has arrived!

[Skynet]

Oh thank go. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have this information in my life.

[Dr. Zoidberg]

Oh thank go.

Thank Gok?

[Skynet]

Oh thank go.

Thank Gok?

It was short for Gary Oldman.

[Bandit]

George W. Bush wants you to know he didn't really get naked with Kanye West

Yes, we know. We're not as stupid as you are.

And he probably asked why the line in Korea had to be contacted when they said a statement would be made to TMZ.

[Dr. Zoidberg]

Roseanne Barr Calls Out Louis C.K.: ‘I’ve Heard So Many Stories’

I’ve been speaking up,” she said, pausing briefly before naming names. “It’s Louis C.K., locking the door and masturbating in front of women comics and writers. I can’t tell you—I’ve heard so many stories. Not just him, but a lot of them. And it’s just par for the course. It’s just shit women have to put up with.” (Louis C.K.’s rep did not respond to a request for comment.)

In a follow-up email to The Daily Beast, Barr added, “These allegations [against Louis C.K.] have been leveled and talked about for years. I do not have first hand knowledge, though have heard women make these allegations.”

It’s not the first time Roseanne has publicly addressed the rumors of Louis C.K.’s alleged misconduct. In April, she tweeted a 2015 Death and Taxes Magazine article entitled “Did Jen Kirkman out Louis CK’s gross behavior on her podcast last month?” in which comedian Jen Kirkman, on her I Seem Fun podcast, leveled undisclosed accusations against a “Cosby level” “famous comic” and “known perv.” Kirkman said the unnamed comedian “didn’t rape me, but he made a certain difficult decision to go on tour with him really hard.”

A few weeks later, the gossip site Defamer posted emails from an anonymous tipster confronting C.K. for a 2014 incident in which he allegedly “[took] his penis out in front of uninterested and frightened girls.” The same article claimed C.K. was the subject of a similar blind item from 2012 about a male comic who allegedly forced two female comedians to watch him masturbate at the Aspen Comedy Festival.

Kirkman later deleted the podcast. Guesting on Nerdist to promote her Netflix special later that summer, she explained, “It’s kind of obvious who I was talking about,” while backpedaling on the degree of creepiness that said male comic allegedly displayed during the inciting incident. “Here’s what it’s really like to be a woman in comedy: you have friends, and sometimes they’re creepy, and they’re really successful,” she said.

[Bandit]

The women CK allegedly jacked off in front of are allegedly Rikki Lindhome and Kate Micucci aka Garfunkle and Oates. Which makes it sound like a bad Louie episode.

[Big Boss Man]

The Spice Girls are back, well kinda, they are now a three piece called GEM

http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-enter ... 26421.html

[OrangeRibbon]

George W. Bush wants you to know he didn't really get naked with Kanye West

Yes, we know. We're not as stupid as you are.

And he probably asked why the line in Korea had to be contacted when they said a statement would be made to TMZ.

Is it weird that him saying he didn't makes me think he did?

[Dr. Zoidberg]

RIP Taylor Swift (2009 – 2016)

They're all cunts.

[Dr. Zoidberg]

Prison builds ‘Hey Dad wall’ to protect disgraced TV star Robert Hughes from ‘faeces and urine’ attacks

MAXIMUM security prison Goulburn Main has built a protective wall to prevent disgraced TV star and convicted paedophile Robert Hughes from being pelted with urine and faeces by fellow inmates.

Jail authorities have erected the special thick-wire screen, dubbed the “Hey Dad wall” by inmates, to stop them from throwing excreta-filled milk cartons at the disgraced television celebrity.

NSW Corrective Services brought in a “builder to alter the jail” with a special barrier after Hughes was bombarded with inmates’ urine and faeces, News Corp’s James Phelps has revealed in a new book.

Hughes, 67, is the former star of television sitcom Hey Dad, who was convicted of the child sexual assault of four young women.



Following his May 2014 conviction, Hughes was imprisoned in Goulburn Correctional Centre where fellow inmates “welcomed” the new prisoner by dousing him with human waste.

Phelps reveals in his new book Australia’s Toughest Prisons — Inmates, that the wall was built after the fallen TV star’s lawyer complained about the treatment.

“It went up because ... his lawyer kicked up a big stink and went hard at everybody. He argued for a reduced sentence because of the treatment [Hughes] received,” a prison officer told Phelps.

The unnamed Goulburn jail guard said that a “special screening of thick, tight wire” has been built since the TV star was “covered head to toe in human waste” while being transferred between yards with other child sex offenders.

Sentenced to a maximum of more than 10 years prison for two counts of sexual assault, seven counts of indecent assault and one count of committing an indecent act, Hughes was placed in a high security “yellow” protection yard with other paedophiles.

What occurred was revealed in James Phelps’ previous book, Australia’s Most Murderous Prison.

“He was never going to be put in ... with general population inmates because they would have killed them,” the Goulburn guard said.

But during the normal course of transfer from an area, called “the Cookhouse”, to an activities yard, Hughes and other protection inmates had to walk through a 40m fenced-off corridor.

Inmates in yards bordering an area called The Circle in Goulburn Main prison lined up against their fences as Hughes crossed the open area and they threw the filled milk cartons at him.

“When Robert Hughes came out of that wing, I would estimate 50 to 70 inmates all ran to the yard,” the officer said.

“We thought, oh s*** it’s on here. Before we knew it he had s*** and p*** thrown on him from the time he walked into the yard to the time he walked out of the back of the yard.

“What they do is s*** and p*** in the little milk containers they’re issued, and they put their arms through the bars and fling it — you would really be surprised how far.

“Hughes was attacked from both sides.”

Following the assault, the guard told Phelps that, covered in human waste, “Hughes sat on top of a small grassy hill in the activities yard, and he cried”



The officer said that Hughes would have been unable to clean himself up without a shower, and then was sent back to his cell and pelted again with urine and faeces on the return trip.

Another Goulburn officer reportedly heard Hughes’ subsequent phone call to his wife, the celebrity acting agent Robyn Gardiner.

“I can’t do it,” Hughes sobbed. “This place is horrible. I thought it would be okay, but I can’t stay here ... in Goulburn. This place is hell. You have to get me out.”

The officer listening in on Hughes’ conversation said the former actor was “a big girl” who begged to be returned to the remand prison, Silverwater, in Sydney where he had been processed.

But despite his tearful pleas, Hughes remained in Goulburn and inmates continued to target him.

Hughes started wearing a thick ski jacket, even in summer, as fellow prisoners often just spat at him.

During one yard transfer, one inmate yelled out “I’m a celebrity, get me out of here”.

When Hughes’ lawyer Greg Walsh applied to the NSW Court of Criminal Appeal to have his sentence reduced, he cited the “inhumane” prison treatment of his client.

In September, 2015, Walsh told the court Hughes had also been targeted with boiling water

Hughes lost his appeal, but the wall went up.

One prison officer told Phelps the wall had reduced the effect of attacks on Hughes, but they still went on.

News.com.au has contacted Corrective Services NSW for a response.

Hughes has sought leave to appeal his child abuse conviction to the High Court of Australia.

Source: news.com.au

[Dr. Zoidberg]

[Bandit]

In other news, nobody gives a fuck.

[Bandit]

Lena Dunham has apologized for racially-charged statements that she made about New York Giants receiver Odell Beckham Jr. during an interview with Amy Schumer. In the apology, the Girls star acknowledges the “often violent history of the over-sexualization of black male bodies, as well as false accusations by white women toward black men.”

As previously reported by The Root, Dunham had this to say about a close encounter with Beckham:

I was sitting next to Odell Beckham Jr., and it was so amazing because it was like he looked at me and he determined I was not the shape of a woman by his standards. He was like, “That’s a marshmallow. That’s a child. That’s a dog.” It wasn’t mean — he just seemed confused.

The vibe was very much like, “Do I want to fuck it? Is it wearing a … yep, it’s wearing a tuxedo. I’m going to go back to my cell phone.” It was like we were forced to be together, and he literally was scrolling Instagram rather than have to look at a woman in a bow tie. I was like, “This should be called the Metropolitan Museum of Getting Rejected by Athletes.”

Yes, that happened. You can read Dunham’s Instagram apology below:

I owe Odell Beckham Jr an apology. Despite my moments of bravado, I struggle at industry events (and in life) with the sense that I don’t rep a certain standard of beauty and so when I show up to the Met Ball surrounded by models and swan-like actresses it’s hard not to feel like a sack of flaming garbage. This felt especially intense with a handsome athlete as my dinner companion and a bunch of women I was sure he’d rather be seated with. But I went ahead and projected these insecurities and made totally narcissistic assumptions about what he was thinking, then presented those assumptions as facts. I feel terrible about it. Because after listening to lots of valid criticism, I see how unfair it is to ascribe misogynistic thoughts to someone I don’t know AT ALL. Like, we have never met, I have no idea the kind of day he’s having or what his truth is. But most importantly, I would never intentionally contribute to a long and often violent history of the over-sexualization of black male bodies- as well as false accusations by white women towards black men. I’m so sorry, particularly to OBJ, who has every right to be on his cell phone. The fact is I don’t know about his state of mind (I don’t know a lot of things) and I shouldn’t have acted like I did. Much love and thanks, Lena

Dunham does not mention her attempts “to grind [her] ass on Michael B. Jordan for an additional twenty minutes” before leaving the Met Gala. She has since edited that line out of her interview with Schumer.

As for her completely “narcissistic assumptions” about Beckham, The Root‘s Stephen Crockett Jr. noted, “The Girls creator took all her self-loathing and placed it on the New York Giants star receiver.” Put differently, she weaponized her body against him while centering herself as the victim.

These kinds of “assumptions” and lies about black masculinity and predatory behavior have led to such cases as the 1944 execution of George Stinney Jr.. Stinney, the youngest person executed in the United States in the 20th century, was 14-years-old and weighed 95 pounds when he was accused of murdering two white girls with a railroad spike. After a long legal battle, his conviction—which was handed down by an all-white male jury in 10 minutes—was overturned in 2014.

These assumptions and lies also led to the 1931 arrest and false imprisonment of Alabama’s Scottsboro Boys, who were accused of raping two white women; the arrest and imprisonment of William Harper after Dorothy Skaggs accused him of rape in Virginia that same year; the 1955 murder of 14-year-old Emmett Till by white supremacists for allegedly whistling at a white woman; and the 1989 arrest and false imprisonment of New York’s Central Park Five, who were accused of raping a white woman.

These are just a few examples of the more high-profile cases.

The hyper-sexualization of black men in the United States goes back to the Antebellum South, when slavery was built and maintained by continued sexual violence against black women. Enslaved black men were often forced to rape enslaved black women in order to produce children who, of course, would be born into slavery. White women were able to fulfill their desires and assert their power on the bodies of black men—and cry victim if the need arose. These interracial “relationships” were somewhat accepted as long as a child was not produced. If by chance contraception failed and an abortion was not obtained, the resulting biracial children were either placed into slavery or became victims of infanticide.

According to Lisa Lindquist Dorr’s White Women, Rape, and the Power of Race in Virginia, 1900-1960, that tepid societal acceptance ended after the Civil War. White womanhood had always been a privileged racial class—though they, too, were raped by white men. But after Reconstruction, the “rape myth”of the black male beast that hungered for white female flesh began as a way to protect and perpetuate white supremacist capitalist patriarchy:

After Reconstruction, whites conflated black men’s desires for white women with their desire for political rights as men, thus creating the rape myth. By the twentieth century, the rape myth was at its height, and it structured most white southerners’ beliefs about the consequences of allowing interaction between white women and black men. The rhetoric about black men’s propensity to rape and the corresponding need for white men to protect white women flourished both in debates about black men’s civil and political rights and in discussions about new freedoms and opportunities for white women. The rape myth thus enforced white women’s subordination to white men and the social, economic, and political power of whites over blacks.

This method of using white female bodies as a means to ensure the economic and political power of white men was evident in both the Tulsa Race Riot of 1921, which led to the destruction of “Black Wall Street,” and the Rosewood Massacre of 1923. Both incidents were sparked by a white woman alleging that a black man had raped her, but the mob violence was flamed because many black men in both areas were doing better financially than their white counterparts.

And into this fraught history steps Lena Dunham, who has now realized several things:

Black male bodies are not the property of white women. There is no mandate that black penises must jump to attention in the mere presence of white female bodies. There is no decree that states that black men must stare with admiration while white women hold court. Black men are allowed to attend a fancy event and not want to “f–k” the white women sitting next to them.

Dunham’s statements do not exist in a vacuum, especially now as the resurfacing of the 1999 rape allegations against Nate Parker—for which he was acquitted—have brought discussions about toxic masculinity, racism, and rape culture to the fore. The woman who pressed charges against Parker, just as most of Bill Cosby‘s alleged victims, was white. In both cases, black feminists have worked relentlessly to unbind race and gender. They have focused with laser-sharp focus on the need to learn and unlearn the definition of consent–informed, implied, explicit, active, or otherwise. Despite their best efforts, the narrative that continues to raise its ugly head is “this is just another white woman accusing a black man of rape”—and any black women who say differently are in league with The White Man™ trying to bring a brother down.

This deeply entrenched stereotype is largely due to the racist history touched on here, but it may also stem from the reality that black women and girls are less likely to report being raped. Why? Because black women and girls who grow up being called “fast” and “whore,” their sexuality policed and baptized away from them, have also been taught that there is a racist system that victimizes black men and boys—because there is. Rarely is focus placed on the criminalization of black women and girls who also face both state and community violence, while still laboring under the expectation that it is their responsibility to protect black men and boys at all costs.

Unequivocally, no man—black, white, or other—is absolved of their responsibility as human beings not to rape other human beings. And it is critical to note here that, despite a history of racist false accusations, only 2-8 percent of rape allegations are false and 97 percent of rapists will never spend a day in jail. Despite these sobering statistics, when white women etch their own assumptions, privilege, insecurities, and desires upon the bodies of black men, particularly black men who have not shown interest, discussions about rape culture become mired in racial tension and often come to a screeching halt.

Dunham’s apology and acknowledgment of her racism in this incident is important and duly noted; however, it is equally important for her to understand that her reckless words help perpetuate a toxic culture that continues to oppress and endanger all women—even white, privileged ones like herself.

If he did act interested in her (use your imagination), she would have bashed him for that and talked about "the NFL rape culture." You can't win with SJWs.

[Dr. Zoidberg]

Angelina Jolie Files for Divorce from Brad Pitt

Angelina Jolie has filed for divorce from Brad Pitt and the trigger was a conflict over the kids, substance abuse and anger ... TMZ has learned.

Jolie filed legal docs Monday citing irreconcilable differences.

She's asking for physical custody of the couple's 6 children. She is asking the judge to give Pitt visitation. It's significant ... she does not want Brad to have joint physical custody ... only joint legal custody.

Sources connected with the couple tell us ... Angelina's decision to file has to do with the way Brad was parenting the children ... she was extremely upset with his methods.

Our sources say, Angelina became "fed up" with Brad's consumption of weed and possibly alcohol, and mixed with what she believes is "an anger problem" ... felt it became dangerous for the children.

Indeed, Angelina's entertainment attorney Robert Offer says she made the decision "for the health of the family."

We're told there was no alleged "third person" ... her decision to file was solely over Brad's interaction with their children.

Jolie, who's being repped by disso queen Laura Wasser, is not asking for spousal support.

Jolie lists the date of separation as Sept. 15, 2016.

They married in August 2014. They've been together since 2004.

The last time we saw them together was in July when they took the twins, Knox and Vivienne, out for a birthday breakfast in West Hollywood.

Source: TMZ

[Dr. Zoidberg]

'You play a slut on TV': Mindy Kaling's brother gets nasty after her refusal to support his book

When Mindy Kaling's brother Vijay Chokal-Ingam revealed last year that he'd been accepted into medical school after posing as an African American student, the sitcom star wasn't exactly keen to get behind the publicity push for her brother's memoir.

At the time, Chokal-Ingam told press his sister - whom he claimed he "loves to death" - was not keen on him going public with his story, and that she had said it would "bring shame on our family."

Now, self-publishing the memoir titled Almost Black: The True Story of How I Got Into Medical School by Pretending To Be Black, Chokal-Ingam has Kaling's quote emblazoned on the cover like a badge of honour. In his Twitter bio, he describes himself as "@MindyKaling's brother/nemesis".

But the abject bitterness about his sister's rejection doesn't stop there, even as he uses her fame to drum up publicity.

Speaking with PageSix, Chokal-Ingam has delivered a very low blow, attempting to slut-shame his sister over her portrayal of Dr Mindy Lahiri on The Mindy Project: "You play a slut on national TV, and you think this [book] will bring shame on the family?"

Kaling has previously said she's benefited from affirmative action programs, so it's understandable that she might not be too happy about her brother's position - or the method through which he got his story.

While Chokal-Ingam is convinced that his experience 15 years ago is a worthy "expose" of affirmative action, critics have pointed out it hardly paints a damning picture of "reverse-racism".

For one thing, there is no real proof that in being accepted to one medical school, any unfair leg-up was given. Chokal-Ingam did not go through with any applications as an Indian American, but rather made assumptions based on the experiences of his friends.

At the same time, he has also discussed the very real experiences of racism that changed when he was performing an African American identity, including harassment from police.

"Nothing remotely like this had ever happened when I was just another Indian doctor's son. Walking in a black man's shoes dimmed much of the youthful enthusiasm I'd had about my deception," he told New York Post.

Yet despite this, he's unwilling to consider that affirmative action has merits and rather than, say, campaigning against police racism, it's the notion that black students might get a leg up in medical school that he has chosen to make his project.

And it seems he's intent on dragging his sister down with him. Too bad nobody else thinks playing Dr Mindy Lahiri on TV is shameful.

Source: The Age

[Bandit]

Kaling has previously said she's benefited from affirmative action programs

Like when FOX aired her shitty show and canceled the actually good Raising Hope before canceling The Mindy Project?

[Dr. Zoidberg]