Coronavirus thread

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melancholy
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by melancholy » Mon Apr 06, 2020 10:19 am

Wow. There's more to unpack from that single paragraph than the amount of actual words spoken. Let's break it down.
  • Coronavirus comes from women's vaginas. Or maybe it comes from mixing a woman's vaginal juices with a man's saliva. His context is not clear.
  • Any way you interpret the first point, you can conclude that men are immune to Coronavirus as long as they don't go near a woman.
  • You could also conclude that women are the direct cause of the Coronavirus.
  • Viruses did not exist between 1930-1950.
  • Nobody ever touched their mouth to a vagina or penis until after the 1950's.
  • In fact, touching your penis to anything that's not a vagina is unnatural.
Good information.

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Roofus
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Roofus » Mon Apr 06, 2020 2:04 pm

Fact check: Could your December cough actually have been coronavirus? Experts say more research is needed

After reading this, I'm pretty sure I had it back in January. I thought it was just a particularly bad cold or flu but the symptoms and timing add up. Plus it was the worst respiratory bug I've ever had and it hung on for about 3 weeks. My sister caught it too and she had to go to the emergency room.

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Bandit
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Bandit » Mon Apr 06, 2020 10:42 pm

Me too. And my doctor even told me "there's a viral respiratory illness going around." I also felt bad for three weeks. It wouldn't be a surprise since people who have been to China are in and out of America constantly. I don't know how it could have been completely clear of the virus everywhere until March. There were probably areas that had it in December.

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Big Boss Man
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Big Boss Man » Tue Apr 07, 2020 12:01 am

It's very possible it was the virus. I read there was a case back in November in Wuhan. If they can retroactively test for Covid-19 I would imagine there would be a high proportion of the worlds population that has already had it and just believed it to be a cough and/or Flu.

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pixel
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by pixel » Tue Apr 07, 2020 12:53 am

I'll feel a lot better when testing is easier and quicker. The hospitals here announced they have a 45-minute test, but I don't know what the availability is.

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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by pixel » Tue Apr 07, 2020 12:54 am

melancholy wrote:
Mon Apr 06, 2020 10:19 am
Wow. There's more to unpack from that single paragraph than the amount of actual words spoken. Let's break it down.
  • Coronavirus comes from women's vaginas. Or maybe it comes from mixing a woman's vaginal juices with a man's saliva. His context is not clear.
  • Any way you interpret the first point, you can conclude that men are immune to Coronavirus as long as they don't go near a woman.
  • You could also conclude that women are the direct cause of the Coronavirus.
  • Viruses did not exist between 1930-1950.
  • Nobody ever touched their mouth to a vagina or penis until after the 1950's.
  • In fact, touching your penis to anything that's not a vagina is unnatural.
Good information.
There are few people other than Pat Robinson that can get my blood boiling. :olol: He's a parasitic POS.

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ian
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by ian » Tue Apr 07, 2020 1:13 am

So roofus and bandit caused ALL the spread of it in America.
I KNEW IT!

Outside of America, The 5G conspiracy makes the most sense of all...
They announce 5G and then after that all this happens.
Coincidence? I DON’T THINK SO!

The antivax, flat earth chemtrails theory is slightly less likely. But ONLY SLIGHTLY!
Hank Azaria not playing Apu on the Simpsons will make the role as irrelevant as the Simpsons has been as a series since 1999!

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Bandit
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Bandit » Tue Apr 07, 2020 2:00 am

ian wrote:
Tue Apr 07, 2020 1:13 am
So roofus and bandit caused ALL the spread of it in America.
I KNEW IT!

Outside of America, The 5G conspiracy makes the most sense of all...
They announce 5G and then after that all this happens.
Coincidence? I DON’T THINK SO!

The antivax, flat earth chemtrails theory is slightly less likely. But ONLY SLIGHTLY!
It's all true. We decided I will take the east coast and he will take the west coast. melancholy refused to join our plot to take the midwest.

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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Ocelot » Tue Apr 07, 2020 2:17 am

But were you in league with Pat Roberston to spread infected vaginal juices or whatever the fuck he thinks did it?

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Bandit
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Bandit » Tue Apr 07, 2020 2:19 am

Yes, I went on a pussy eating rampage in China first.

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melancholy
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by melancholy » Tue Apr 07, 2020 3:17 am

I think we all understand what Pat is really trying to tell us by saying oral sex with women caused the virus: everyone should just be gay.

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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by pixel » Tue Apr 07, 2020 4:08 am

Or never reciprocate oral sex :dontknow" :rofl:

Ocelot
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Ocelot » Tue Apr 07, 2020 4:39 am

From now on I'm not licking no furburgers in exchange for oral. If hoz won't give me a suckjob for nothing in return they can get to steppin'!

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Wed Apr 08, 2020 2:18 am








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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by pixel » Fri Apr 10, 2020 3:19 am


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melancholy
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by melancholy » Fri Apr 10, 2020 10:41 am

I need to start doing that on the 1 day a week I actually go to work.

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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Dr. Zoidberg » Sat Apr 11, 2020 12:42 pm


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Calavera
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Calavera » Sat Apr 11, 2020 6:04 pm

Calavera wrote:
Sun Mar 29, 2020 7:35 pm
Calavera wrote:
Mon Mar 23, 2020 6:42 pm
There are currently 82 confirmed cases in Marion out of the 201 statewide total.
I posted this on the 23rd only 6 days ago. Now there are 584 cases in Marion County and 1,232 statewide. 8 cases in Delaware County and 15 in Ripley County. So the statewide total has went up 6x in six days.
I posted that on March 29th. Now on April 11th there are 2,600 cases in Marion country and 6,907 statewide! 56 in Delaware County and 79 in Ripley. Current Indiana death total is 300. 19 days ago there was only 201 cases in the state.

So in just 19 days it has went from 201 statewide to 6,907.
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melancholy
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by melancholy » Sat Apr 11, 2020 10:52 pm

And that’s just reported cases. There are far, far more than that. For instance, Jay County only had 3 reported cases last week. But one of my parents friends live there and their whole family got it. They only tested the dad since he became the sickest and knew the rest of them had it too when it came back positive. That means the county had at least double the reported number then.

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Calavera
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Re: Coronavirus thread

Post by Calavera » Sun Apr 12, 2020 6:17 am

I just tried to go to the Dollar General in town. I only leave the house once a week if that. I had to walk right back out of the store. You wouldn't believe how many stupid mother fuckers are in there not even making an attempt to stay apart at all! Right inside the door is a group of 4 people just standing there. I just can't believe how fucking stupid these god damn idiots are! Some stupid old fat bitch walks in with two people with her and stands right inside the door and says "oh look hot pickles" I wanted to knock her fucking teeth down her old bitch throat. They have Xs on the floor at the cashier to stand 6 feet apart but all those stupid redneck motherfuckers are shoulder to shoulder. This is the reason why it is spreading so bad. Nobody had a mask on except me. People buying easter bullshit wtf! It isn't like everybody there was just buying essential items. Oh hell its nice outside today lets go shopping. I hate people. How bad does it need to get before people take this seriously? Honestly even if this virus had a 50 percent fatality rate these fucking people still wouldn't take it seriously. God damn it pisses me off!!!
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